“Fake Gay News: Because Real Gay News Is Too Damn Depressing”

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A satirical blog. You may or may not be amused by Fake Gay News items like this:

Christian Meteorologists Declare War on Rainbows
“A group of conservative Christian meteorologists today announced plans to eliminate rainbows from the earth’s atmosphere. At a press conference following a White House luncheon with President Bush, lead scientist Bret Banger told reporters that his organization, Climatologists For Christ, had declared open season on the multi-colored spectrums of light as part of their commitment to eradicating”the homosexual lifestyle and all weather patterns that reflect it.”

“The rainbow flag was adopted by gay rights activists to represent diversity in the gay community during the early 1980s, when gays and lesbians were too busy battling the Reagan Administration’s homophobia and discriminatory AIDS policies to come with a better idea.

“Because rainbows are composed of curved spectrums of light that become visibile only when the sun’s light passes through prism-like raindrops during a rain shower, Climatologists for Christ are focusing their efforts on ending all forms of rain.

“When reporters questioned how the earth would survive without rainfall, Banger fired back,”The love of God will keep us moist!”

“In a show of support, President Bush has introduced the Heterosexual Hemispheres Act, which would ban the use of rainbow flags, the chasing of rainbows, as well as the possibility of it ever raining men.

“The Weather Girls could not be reached for comment.”

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