Work/Life Balance

That’s the topic of this op-ed in The Oregonian, entitled “Power moms not only ones needing help,” which quotes Feminist Law Prof Naomi Cahn:

Surely the nation has reached its quota on books and articles about highly educated, professional women and their struggle to self-actualize after having children.

So please, no more books like “Mommy Wars” and “Perfect Madness.” No more stories about average, ordinary mothers who just happen to be Yale-educated lawyers with nannies and well-paid husbands.

These stories are fascinating, and Lord knows I’ve read every word. But it’s long past time to tune in to the rest of the working world.

The shift workers. The retail clerks. The waitresses and the line cooks. The single mothers with no give, and the dads whose employers offer zero flexibility.

“I have been trying to interest reporters in this for years,” said Joan C. Williams, director of the Center for WorkLife Law and author of “Unbending Gender: Why Family and Work Conflict and What to Do About It.”

But the media, she says, keep hashing over the same old question: How do white-collar women (such as, say, journalists) raise children without squandering their college degrees and man-worthy careers?

“If you look at the coverage of this in the United States, it’s focused very heavily on professional women,” Williams said, “and, more narrowly, on the women who choose to opt out.”

Williams isn’t the first family-law expert to notice the media bias. Michael Selmi and Naomi Cahn, both law professors at George Washington University, criticized the phenomenon in the spring issue of the Duke Journal of Gender Law & Policy.

The media show a “disproportionate interest in the travails of professional women,” they wrote. As a result, the public debate about improving the work-life balance reflects the specific desires of well-paid professionals: better part-time work, longer leaves, more flex time and fewer hours.

These worthy ideas sound like fever dreams to the tens of millions of women (and men) with bigger problems on their hands. They are the people who need extra shifts to make ends meet; who get in trouble for calling home during work; who lack the savings or eligibility to take unpaid family leave.

Such stories rarely get told, Cahn said. “We read about people like us all the time,” she added, “and we were seeing how comparatively idyllic our lives are.”

The media will no doubt keep featuring high-powered, conflicted mothers who leave the work force. For one thing, readers love these stories. They’re the perfect morality tale for a society that’s ambivalent about powerful women — and wary of mothers who act too much like fathers.

For another, “there’s a belief that professional women set the standard,” Cahn said, “and once they’ve managed to crack the glass ceiling, or settle this work-life issue, there will be a trickle-down effect for everyone else.”

But at a certain point, the media will have profiled every angst-ridden professional woman in the country. Every lawyer torn between Barney and billable. Every corporate executive with spit-up on her suit. Every stay-at-home mom with a career on hold and a doctorate in explaining herself.

When that time comes, perhaps these women can catch a break and enjoy their children and choices in peace. Public attention can shift to societal changes that would help all working parents.

Cahn and Selmi advocate more after-school programs. They also make the rare point that a helpful husband can do more for his wife’s sanity and children’s well-being than any employer.

Williams encourages businesses to let shift workers take unpaid leave in two- or three-hour blocks, so they can tend to occasional family needs without calling in sick or cheating the clock. She further recommends overtime systems that don’t penalize workers who must hurry home after a shift.

These changes may not make or break the career of the female CEO. But they might make a world of difference for a few hundred of her employees.