Full story here. See also. Text of dumbass Eleventh Circuit opinion that will not be reviewed here. Text of completely stupid Alabama law here. Video of Molly Ivins weighing in on similarly ridiculous Texas law here. Online source of vibrating “personal massagers” that people in Alabama desiring something “designed to relieve tension and sooth sore aching muscles” might still be able to legally purchase here. Why the Alabama government wants to impede masturbation, the one form of sex that can be enjoyed without risk of disease, unplanned pregnancy, or exploitive financial commoditization, I have no idea, but if South Carolina adopts a simliar regime the popularity of linear art glass might, uh, surge.