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Audrey Westover is the fictional name Tara Westover gives to her only sister in the memoir Educated. He astutely asked me, Does she have Stockholm Syndrome? Although I had never considered it, being so absorbed by the memoir, there is a good chance he was absolutely right. Is Gene Westover still alive? So while I understand Tyler is probably trying to come from a place of mercy and reconciliation here, it's a dead wrong and demeaning attitude in response to significant abuse. Shawn began sending her threatening emails and even called her long-distance one evening to openly muse about whether he should hire an assassin to murder Tara or do the deed himself. And you can feel Tyler's self-delusion just as viscerally. D despite the abuse she endured. She does not quote from or paraphrase what she wrote, even though in numerous other exchanges (both verbal and in emails) she paraphrases what has been said by her family members (such as her mother) during conflicted exchanges, italicizing the statements to indicate the change (it's strange she chooses to do this rather than at least partially quote her correspondents -- I wonder if this has to do with making sure not to break privacy laws). Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. I think being neglected by your parents, especially to this extreme where they basically would allow you to die because of their selfishness and criminal reckless disregard really does a number on you mentally. My students love how organized the handouts are and enjoy tracking the themes as a class., Requesting a new guide requires a free LitCharts account. She had ended up dating the young man (Charles) who had been the subject of Shawn's threats and animosity when he had been interested in a local girl (Sadie) Shawn was involved with. Dad urges Tara to bring, family where she is while the doctor administers a CAT scan and determines that though, junkyard, BYU seems like a distant dream. Although there has been overwhelming support for the book, there have also been accusations of more fiction than fact. The email describes Audreys own experiences suffering, Audrey apparently shows the emails to Mother, and soon Tara is emailing with Faye about, mother, Faye assures her that Dad has been told about whats going on, and that, go. Your email address will not be published. -Graham S. The timeline below shows where the character Shawn Westover appears in, will be the third of Taras brothers to leave home, after Tony, the eldest, and. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC. And why doesnt Tara Westover reveal his real name? One night, before Christmas, the forms. But Fayes support and understanding would sadly prove to be illusory. However, because I was not there, I cannot make any certain conclusions. She has been a home schooling parent. His memory of the car accident, for example, is very, very, very different from hers. PDF downloads of all 1699 LitCharts literature guides, and of every new one we publish. My bro in laws stories are pretty harmless, but Taras stories, if she did embellish, is quite hurtful. and writes another entry in which she tries to tell herself that the fight with, job at Stokes back and finds that she has no trouble avoiding both Dad and, has died, or her brain has adjusted to its shocks. Tara calls home and has. So many signs of abuse: mental and emotional, this a no brainer. LaRee Westover feels that she, like Robert Frost, has taken "the path less traveled," and it has made all the difference. She recalls passing the time with him by playing elaborate word games, learning trucker lingo, eating junk food, and playing video gamesall new experiences for her. Her eyes were glassy and drops slid down her cheeks. As a therapist to young adults, many of whom come from ample privilege, I am struck by how hard some have fought for their education such as Westover, while others waste it away, calling all of life beyond their screens a bore. My parents said he was justified in cutting me off. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Audrey Westover: Why Shes Estranged From Tara. Find related themes, quotes, symbols, characters, and more. He takes issue with Tara describing the knife Shawn used to kill the dog as "a knife of rage" well, that's how metaphor works. Definitions and examples of 136 literary terms and devices. Metallic. Was her memory to be trusted? The victim however will very acutely remember details, because the subconscious number one priority is to survive in the best most efficient way possible. Shawn was trying to make you more comfortable, she said. Both teeth healed fine. Oh, I just LOVE my brother, even when hes breaking my bones and threatening my life. She made a public show of laughing as Shawn paraded her through the store at the gas station, in front of the people whod witnessed the attack in the parking lot just minutes before. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. LaRee Westover referred a call from the Citizen regarding the publication of their daughter Tara Westover's book, "Educated," to Atkin. I mean, its not my way of looking at it, Westover said. Ultimately, it would be the desire to have her family acknowledge and confront this abuse that would turn them against her for good. Tara was afraid to reveal the abuse to her parents out of fear that they already knew and had chosen to do nothing about it. As I combed through Amazon reviews of Educated, I was struck by the controversy as well. The book is Tara's memoir. Even if, let's say, she had been been verbally sassy with her brother "Shawn," once he started threatening her with a knife, threatening to kill her, physically holding her in a painful and injury-threatening position, shoved her head into the toilet, yanked her hair and made her fall into the bathtub, and so on, does it matter whether she said something less-than-cordial to her brother? When Tara suffered a neck injury from a car accident, he refused to take her to the hospital. Eventually, Sadie began altering her behavior to appease Shawns volatile personality. Trouble with Extended Family and Neighbors Several chapters in the book admit the Westovers often didn't get along with extended family and others in their community. A memoir is a nonfiction book that tells your own story, focusing on elements of your real life like personal experience, intimacy, and emotional truth. It was definitely blood. Not knowing Tara at all, Id personally want to give her the benefit of the doubt, but its not like there isnt any incentive to paint things in a way that makes the story more provocative. Is the book educated appropriate for middle school? Tara had lost her family. A few days later Dad came home with the most frightening machine Ive ever seen. Westover says Shawn choked her on two occasions when she was a teenager, and shoved her head into a toilet bowl while calling her a whore. Gene Hill Westover passed away March 6, 2018, he was born August 20, 1931 in Granger, UT to Nina and Arthur Westover. It's unfortunately the same issue that Tara herself struggles with in her book, she is in the end not nearly critical enough of her family - understandable because she needs to have peace of mind, but not encouraging for anyone reading who is in an abusive situation and doesn't need to hear "but hey now when I think back on my abuser, I remember how he would smile with a crinkle in his eyes.." So trite, fuck your abusers, period. Hello. that she might not have the funds to return to Utah. For all my obsessing over the consequences of that night, I had misunderstood the vital truth: that its not affecting me, that was its effect. Well cover parts of Educated that demonstrate the complicated relationship between Audrey Westover and the author. When Tara protested again (her resistance was obviously a trigger for him), Shawn once more pinned Tara to the floor and dragged her to the bathroom, where he shoved her face into the toilet. Tara doesnt see, Tara approaches Mother and Dad in the giant chapel room and tells her father what, looks in the mirror, she remembers staring in the mirror as a young girl after, wants to run from the house, but Dad tells her to sit and wait for, lecturing, Tara, wanting to get out of the situation no matter the cost, begins telling, the days that follow, Tara goes over the sickening, dreamlike events of the confrontation with, Back at Cambridge, Tara withdraws from her friends. Later that evening, Faye got in touch with Tara online to discuss the matter further. LitCharts Teacher Editions. She starts installing it, but when, Chapter 14: My Feet No Longer Touch Earth, dusty farm town on the other side of the mountain. yeah, had a brother like that and he was a sexual abuser as well, ended with attempted murder and the cops being sent but his enabling mother protected him as always while I the sister believe he should of spent the rest of his life in maximum security for the mentally insane for all the horrible abuse. and couldn't go against him when he's part of their day-to-day life, versus the daughter who was living and studying on the East Coast or overseas. He cant allow himself to see the truth because it would risk too much. This article is an excerpt from the Shortform summary of "Educated" by Tara Westover. Refine any search. Talking to you, she said, your reality is so warped. I don't know how much the details matter when we're talking about something like Tara's brother making a death threat to assassinate her, or him putting a bloody knife in her hand that he'd just used to kill a family dog. When she refused, he lifted her off the ground by her hair, dragged her into the bathroom, and pushed her head into the toilet. Tara Westover's brother Tyler has a blog calling into question much of what was written in Educated. If anything she UNDERPLAYED it. They are conservative, patriotic people. Tara would spend much of the rest of her time on Bucks Peak subject to Shawns displays of kindness, which were all too often followed by displays of terrifying cruelty and violence. It was one of her first steps toward recognizing what Shawn truly wasand recognizing, also, how her family had implicitly condoned his abuse. oily shirt, and drinking out of a garden hose. On the one hand, he was a violent abuser who seemed to have little regard for the physical and emotional safety of others. She also doesn't delve far into her rejection of Mormon beliefs (other than her realizing she wouldn't want to be part of a polygamy situation, whether in real life or in heaven). Tara's early memories of Shawn are hazyhe hasn't lived at home for a long period of time, and when he finally moves back in, he's earned a reputation throughout town for being quick to violence and hot-tempered. She called us, and I went with my parents to pick Shawn up. Family, friend, or fan, this family history biography is for you to remember Shawn O Westover. One thing we do know is that Tara has a tendency to downplay or give small attention to her part in some of the other relationships she writes about. I tend to conclude that Taras description of the accident came in large part from her imagination, which she then later remembered as memories, similar to an incident that she writes about at the beginning of Educated. That is the only way that I can reconcile her memories with mine and with the facts that can be verified. After that, she pursued learning for a decade, graduating magna cum laude from Brigham Young University and subsequently winning a Gates Cambridge Scholarship. In the weeks following a car crash, Tara experienced great difficulty moving her neck. Surprisingly, it worked, probably by cushioning Richards impact, although her instinct to save Richard likely added to making her own injury worse. Faye confessed to having looked the other way at what her son was doing to her daughters. Hed become acquainted with a girl named Sadie who was involved in the same theater as Tara. She is a business woman, a wife, a mother, and grandmother. []. Shes published dozens of articles and book reviews spanning a wide range of topics, including health, relationships, psychology, science, and much more. To them, she was the abuser. I actually think this mostly validates Taras experience. (*if it turns out years from now we get confirmation that she literally made everything up, ok, obviously that would change things. The mother too, who was captive by her husband, probably didnt register the events as super important, relative to what the norm was. But I think part of respecting yourself, actually, and your ability to have your own ideas is respecting other peoples right for the same. Westover remains estranged from about half of her family, including her parents, she said. In speaking about this incident with her sister Audrey, Tara learned that she, too, had been abused by Shawn. beasts. Perhaps tired of his bossiness, Tara dumped the glass on his head. Mother said my rage was a real threat and that Shawn had a right to protect his family. When he would drive her to rehearsals at the theater, Shawn would bait and bully Taras friends there. Shawn She continues in the body of the text, "Educated, Westover's memory by upgrading Shawn's public record with words and pictures, the pseudonymous Shawn, Audrey ultimately chooses not to escape the life she has had and instead condones what has happened, Westover presents Shawnthe second among seven Westover siblings, Tributes.com Shawn was born on June 5, Richard, Her other . They're like having in-class notes for every discussion!, This is absolutely THE best teacher resource I have ever purchased. Westover grew up in a bleak Idahoan valley wrought with fear. By the second half of the memoir, Shawn is married to Emily. Reviewed by Lybi Ma. The ground gave way beneath my feet, dragging me downward, spinning fast, like sand rushing through a hole in the bottom of the universe. An omission need not be a "lie of omission," but rather a form of expedience, as well as self-protection. I believe we were at the hospital less than an hour with Shawn being conscious the entire time. Faye, meanwhile, sat by completely silent, failing to rise in defense of Taras claims. It dawned on her that Shawn was astride her, choking her with both hands, while screaming Slut! and Whore! It was only through the intervention of her mother and Tyler that Tara survived the assault. They cut not by sharpness but by force and mass. Individuals from all walks of life, both those known to the Westover family and outside of their world completely have weighed in. Indeed, Shawn was the only one who could stand up to Gene on a consistent basisand win. One of the basic reasons for starting an herbal/essential oil company was to provide others with affordable and natural alternative resources for their families. (including. Tara's mother, father, and abusive brother are all horrible, horrible people and they should be condemned in the strongest terms. This is Tyler's take on them. The knife was small, only five or six inches long and very thin. I did not yet understand that it was this fact of being tenderof having lived some years of a life that allowed tendernessthat would, finally, save me. He demanded that she accompany him inside. | In the reality she constructed for herself nothing had been wrong before her brother fell off that pallet. Back in Idaho, Tara auditions for a production of Carouseland to her great surprise, parents announce that theyre getting a divorce. While Educated is heart-wrenching at times, there are also incredibly tender moments of a brother leaving behind a beloved choir music CD for a sister, and her studying at a borrowed desk working toward her education. I also had a pretty oppressive dad, and so my brothers actions relative to my dads tyranny probably didnt trigger the need to remember details. Like this article? 4 Practical Mental Health Lessons From Tara Westover's Memoir. We need not look further than Westovers loss of her first love and second significant relationship to see how deeply family issues can invade and destroy future lasting unions. Add to that a brother who by the account provided in the memoir should in actuality be contacted by Child and Protective Services (CPS). How I had hollowed myself out. But I'm speaking of the experiences expressed by the abused that we currently have from her account in the book, which I have no reason to doubt any more than I doubt what happened to my sister). He dragged her out of the car and pinned her face-down onto the asphalt parking lot, breaking her wrist and ankle in the process. What has been missed perhaps throughout the dialogue is not just the story of a bright and deeply courageous young woman escaping a lifetime of abuse, but rather a story of identity formation in the face of severe parental mental illness. Shawn Westover is the fictitious name Tara Westover gives to one of her brothers in her memoir Educated. Ive read Tyler talk about how his father encouraged him to go to college, but I dont see that to be a contradiction. She ignored the pain from her wrist and ankle. Amanda received her Master's Degree in Education from the University of Pennsylvania. Her friend Charles joined the Westovers for dinner for the holiday. As Dad picks up the phone to call, act like children, shell treat them like children. He then used on her one of the same torture techniques he had taught her on their recent road trip: twisting her wrist and pushing it in a spiral against her inner forearm, causing excruciating pain. To be frank, it looks like they are living in squalor, or at least were. They were really good about reading it, giving me lots of feedback. As a contemporary of Westovers (we were born one year apart), I recall a life dotted with far fewer screens and media that encouraged the perusal of texts with pages you could hold in your two hands. Whats more, her big toehurt badly in her Thanksgiving day fight with, On a break from work in the scrap yard one afternoon, Tara and. Because it will be better than what Ill do to you if you dont.. Shawn fingered the thick steel, which I was sure he could tell was not cheap at all. Thats certainly not the truth. There is a bonding that happens between victim and captor and there is no doubt that Tara was the victim to Shawns twisted violent and abusive antics. It happened about a year before I returned and by that time the scars had faded to be nearly invisible except perhaps under a close investigation. What is Shawns relationship with his sister Tara like? It is that ubiquitous airplane video of securing our own mask before those of others near us. And I shouldn't attack him, because that will inevitably hurt his feelings and the feelings of my poor grandfather, grandma, aunt, and other people who negligently allowed his behavior to occur. Tara also mentions writing an extremely angry, prolonged, and what sounds like possibly obscenity-laced email to her father, during her time at college (can't remember if it's at Cambridge or Harvard). What is Audreys relationship with her sister Tara like? Shawn is a violent and threatening presence in the memoir. I don't think it matters who is objectively right or wrong as it is irrelevant to who the people became. Besides, Tyler doesn't dispute the killing itself, nor the fact that Shawn did do the killing immediately prior to coming in and threatening Tara with the bloody knife Shawn's abusive nature is clear from many of Tyler's stories. When they returned home, Tara went to her room to write about the experience in her diary. Audrey reveals that no one, after all, has believed her and Taras words about, an eye in a paintball accident and grown a long, thick beard. Required fields are marked *. Other times, he would force her to buy items for him, only to change his mind and chastise her for bringing him the wrong thing. I feel like her account backs-up a lot of Taras experience. All contact was cut of by my as soon as I was able to and that is the only way to handle pychos like him. The blades were made of dense iron, twelve inches thick and five feet across. LaRee supports him. Arguably the biggest success in publishing over the last few years, Educated just crossed two years on the New York Times best-seller list. Not minehed merely handed me the knifebut whose? This harsh treatment actually did help: Tara could once again pivot her neck. I cant understand why her parents protected their abusive son and let him abuse their own flesh and blood. In the course of this attack, Tara broke her toe. To them, shed hurled baseless accusations at her brother and caused him and his family endless emotional anguish. I thank the universe every day that he already died except that unfortunate it wasn't painful or long enough of a process when he did. You'll be able to access your notes and highlights, make requests, and get updates on new titles. Stories such as Westovers remind us of the privilege of education, and opportunities, and the real meaning of diversity. We arrived in time to see two nurses bandaging his head. Faye acknowledged that she should have protected Tara and Audrey. There are women, children and animals still in the clutches of these uncontrolled psychopathic fanatics. And I sure wouldn't want to hurt those feelings. My moms head hit the windshield, giving her a large bruise and likely a concussion. Instant PDF downloads. Tara soon had her own firsthand experience with Shawns volatility when he, without warning, put his hands around her head and violently twisted itto help pop her neck back into place following the accident, or so he claimed. I wrote a book and I created this website to post some things about it. He is always somewhat erratic, but his behavior seems to become heightened after he suffers a traumatic brain injury. He and Tara had gone to Preston to spend the evening, and on the way back Shawn ran into a herd of cows. Eventually, Shawn stopped calling her. Thats actual proof, plus comments from others who actually witnessed her brothers violence. At home, I remember that my moms headache got worse as the swelling and pressure on her brain increased. Press J to jump to the feed. How Do You Treat A Flail Chest In The Field? Butterfly Express was established 22 years ago by LaRee Westover and her daughter Valaree Sharp. I do remember there being discussion even with one of the police officers regarding whether an ambulance should be called to take my mom or anyone else to the hospital. Her father, who may have bipolar disorder, canned peaches to prepare for doomsday. Tara's book has raced to the top of the New York Times Bestseller list and has placed her in front of worldwide media. I tried to get control of the car and hit the brake but in the surprise of the moment, I probably actually stepped on the gas. Nonetheless, I was left feeling that the story was not fully told, and I resented that since when I picked up the book, I did not think I was going to be pulled into a family drama. In a local newspaper article, Taras parents said they did their best with what they knew about the situation. Luke has said that the pain was not very bad, but considering the nature of the burn, that is difficult to understand. I wish I had my best friend back, she wrote. Plus he admitted his father pushed him for his own benefit - he wanted Tyler to get an engineering degree to save his business money. Shortly after Shawn Westover came back home, he invited Tara to come along with him on a long-haul trucking job down the West Coast. 12 offers from $30.18. Reading his wifes blog is just sad. I can read my journals from this period and trace the evolutionof a young girl rewriting her history. I will save discussing the safety aspects of those events for a later post, and here I will only comment on the healing aspects. She describes being told she was contentious and inappropriate for advocating for pretty normal things. Whether fully accurate or only partially so, Educated is a deeply inspiring and thought-provoking read on the fire within each and every one of us to overcome adversity should we fight hard enough for it. One year, when Taras grandpa is given a trained bay gelding from a relative, A month before Tara turns fifteen, she is outside on a summer evening helping, driving long-haul rigs to earn a living, but when his wife gets sick, he asks.